Re-turn!

re·turn
/rəˈtərn/
verb
1       
come or go back to a place or person.”he returned to Canada in the fall”
2       synonyms:
go back, come back, get back, arrive back, arrive home, come home, come again “he returned to London”
give, put, or send (something) back to a place or person.”complete the application form and return it to this address”
noun
1       
an act of coming or going back to a place or activity.”he celebrated his safe return from the war”
2       synonyms:
3       homecoming, travel back “failing health forced his return to Paris”

The word return can invoke several different emotions in me. Sometimes I think about returning to past times and it can make me feel sad. Missing my parents, missing friends I know longer get to see, and knowing that you can never really return to those moments that were filled with such joy a long time ago. It leaves me feeling a little blue, but always with an edge of happiness knowing I got to experience such wonderful things with special people in my life.

The word return can also invoke anticipation. Most recently I have returned to my “happy place”, Laguna Beach. Thinking about returning here always makes me excited, like a little kid that can’t wait to go on a road trip. My family & I  RE-turned a couple of days ago, and I immediately thought about beginning my ” best RE-venge” journey exactly one year ago. It was while I was here in Laguna exactly one year ago, that I decided to take some steps to change my life. As many of you now I feel like I have had a very blessed life, got to work in what I was absolutely passionate about, met the man of my dreams, have a beautiful family with two smart loving and kind daughters.  I went from being a polyanna and really happy each today, to feeling disillusioned, sad, depressed. How could this be me? What happened? I had so much, what more could a person ask for? I beat myself up asking these questions because I felt like I should just be grateful for all of my blessings, I  had so many that were amazing.

But, I was becoming more depressed and unhappy. It was a difficult journey to get to the root of and in touch with exactly what was making me feel that way. I’m sure a lot of you have gone through similar things at some point in your life. It is difficult to admit, hard to deal with, and at times feels almost impossible to climb out of.
My passion for dance & production began to wane. I felt as if there was disengagement & disrespect all around me, at a job I once was in love with. I let it filter into every aspect of my being, my life & my relationships. I was always able to see my path and the road I thought I should be on, and suddenly I felt as if there were forks everywhere in the road and I was lost.

That’s when I sat here at the beach and decided to get “me” back through the power of “RE”. RE-imagine, RE- create, RE-align. All of these words are so positive and so empowering. I suddenly felt like with this focus I could do anything  I set my mind to again.

I started with baby steps…. REminding myself to do just 1 smalll thing each day to make myself smile. Take 30 minutes each day to exercise ( I walk) and REimagine what I wanted for my self and my family. Writing my journey down to share with others who might be experiencing the same disillusionment and making plans for things that would ignite my passions again.

Well, it’s one year later and I am feeling better about myself than I have in a long, long time. I have found some joy again in my profession. I am starting to focus on another business that is in its fledging day’s but is bringing me a lot of inspiration and excitement to see just how far it can go! I am working on that with a group of like minded women. We support each through every step and it is s testament to what having an incredible support system can help you achieve!

I’m hoping my blog is a “remote” support system for anyone out there that needs an ear, a shoulder to cry on or someone to help push them up the hill! I’m your gal…. reach out, comment, question… I’ll look forward to chatting with you!

Your best Re-venge….living a kick ass life! Let’s get ours together!